To my dearest Neelsi,
Happy six month birthday!
I can’t believe you are 6 months old! Where did the past six months go?
I wanted to do something special for you, and thought it would be fun to write
you a letter to tell you about how you have blessed our lives in the past six
months, and taught all of us to smile more no matter what adversities we
face.
When I found out I was having you,
I was very happy, but also really worried.
I didn't know how in the world I would be able to love someone as much
as I loved your big brother. But I was
wrong. The moment I held you in my arms,
all my doubts disappeared, and I felt at peace.
The minute your tiny hands held my finger, I felt my heart overflowing
with joy and eyes well with tears.
Despite having felt the same emotion with your brother, this felt
different… you my love have completed me, and our family.
Being pregnant with you was a wonderful experience, you
motivated me to be healthy, active, and forced me to take care of myself. You also reminded me constantly that you were
watching over me by constantly kicking and punching me J The healthy lifestyle while
being pregnant totally paid off, I was really worried about getting gestational
diabetes, but I never got it. For the
most part I was healthy and happy.
After
my first trimester, we broke the news to Dhruv that he was going to be a big
brother. At first he never really
understood what it meant. As my belly
continued growing, Dhruv started understanding more that there was something
growing inside me, and with that his love for you grew even before you were
born. Dhruv loved coming with us for the
doctor visits to see you on the “tv”.
During his first visit you gave him a thumbs up, and Dhruv could not
stop talking about it. He was falling
more and more in love with you one day at a time.
You were born on
November 3rd, a Monday.
For most people it was an ordinary day, but for us it was a very special
one. We finally got to meet you, and
welcome you to this wonderful world.
Neel, I cannot put in words how I felt when I saw you for the first
time, it felt like coming home. Amongst
all the other sweet things about you, two things really stood out for me – your
beautiful luscious black hair, and your very strong grip. You always held on to our clothes so tightly,
it was unusual for a newborn to do so. When you were in my belly, I would feel
a constant tugging on my umbilical cord, and now I know it was you tugging on
the cord with your powerful grip. Dhruvi was equally thrilled to see you, the
moment he saw you, for 15 minutes all he kept doing was jumping on the couch in
the hospital room, and shouting that he was a big brother now. When we brought
you home, Dhruvi would often say to you “ I was waiting for you for so long to
come out of mamma’s tummy”. You brought
out a side in your brother that we have never seen. You truly made him more responsible, kind,
and thoughtful without really knowing it.
You made him a bhaiya.
Adjusting to our new normal took some time, we were lucky
Papa was home for the most part and always with us. Dhruvi fell sick and so did I. All the pregnancy hormones leaving my body
was making me sad and angry. When I
should have been ecstatic and elated, I felt there was a constant dark cloud
looming over me. I was not myself, and
it was very hard on everyone especially Papa.
We quickly realized trying to settle into a new normal without your
grandparents was going to be hard, we asked mamma’s dad, your aajoba to come as
soon as he could, but he couldn’t come sooner than his original plan. Therefore, we called aaji and aba, and had
them take the next flight and get here sooner than they had originally
planned. As always they put us before
themselves, and packed up in a heartbeat and came to be with us.
We were very fortunate to have aaji and aba with us so soon.
The next few weeks were extremely hard on our family. It started with Dhruvi falling sick again, a
case of viral, and that made you sick.
You were less than three weeks old, and you had your first upper
respiratory infection, which then became a fever. We took you to the ER, where they poked your
tiny little body a gazillion times and also did a spinal tap. Given that you were so little and had a
fever, we were asked to stay in the hospital for three nights. Seeing your arm with an IV, and hearing you
cry when they poked you was the most heartbreaking thing for your papa and
me. I wish I could have taken all the
pain for you, and not put you through the ordeal, but all I could do was stand
and watch, hold your hand, try to comfort you, and pray to god you would never
remember this trying period in your life.
No one should have to go through the ordeal you did. Despite all that, you my love are a really
strong and brave boy. You endured all of
it and managed to sport a smile through it all.
It was your courage, sparkly eyes, infectious smile, and perseverance
that helped us all get over this trying period in our lives.
At two months, you were slowly gaining your
strength and starting to hold your neck.
We were not doing a lot of tummy time with you, but once we started
giving you tummy time, you started becoming stronger and doing better at
holding your neck. We celebrated your
first Christmas. I remember you helping
us decorate the tree by sitting in your swing and being covered with
glitter. You were the cutest baby Santa in the world, and your brother and you together in your matching pajamas made
the Christmas spirit come alive for us.
We were so shaken up by you falling sick that we tried to stay away from
taking you to many public places, therefore, you never got to meet Santa Claus.
You are no longer an infant and becoming more of a
baby. You have the most beautiful brown
eyes, and the most heartiest smile. You now smile knowingly and on demand. Aaji loving calls you Hasmukh. At three
months, you had discovered your toes, and realized you can put your toes in
your mouth. This was and is your most
favorite thing to do even now. You love
sucking on your toes. You have also
realized Dhruvi is special. You will
look for ways to get your bhaiya’s attention.
You my love are getting cuter by the minute.
We have still been going through some ups and downs with
your health. It is always the same,
runny nose followed by a cough. You are
such a brave boy sweetheart! Despite being sick, you are constantly happy and
always smiling. Your smile is infectious
and spreads to everyone you meet. For
the first time in your short life, you got the pink eye, despite that you were
your always happy self, constantly smiling J
For the first time since you were born, I had to leave you overnight for a
business trip to Chicago. Unfortunately,
I couldn't avoid it and I had to go. I
vividly remember the picture as I walked out of the door. Bhaiya holding you and crying and saying
mamma is leaving us, broke my heart L The doctor recommended you start solids at
four months, and to commemorate this big milestone, we had an ushtavaan for
you. You ate like a champion, it was as
if you have been doing this for your whole life. You have a very strong grip and have started
holding things in your hand. In fact,
you have easily mastered the art of holding your milk bottle and your pacifier
in your mouth. You roll over
beautifully, so much so that we have stopped swaddling you with your hands
inside the swaddle cloth.
At five months, I could see more and more of your
personality emerge. You have quickly
realized you need to call for attention.
You love your bhaiya, but you can equally hold your own, and express
anger and discomfort when he squishes you too hard. You are almost in a routine and promptly wake
up at 6.00 AM star eyed and bushy tailed.
You love being outdoors, and use your voice and hands to express you are
ready to go outside. Your favorite
routine is to go outside in the morning and wave goodbye to your papa when he
leaves for work and give bhaiya a kiss when he leaves for school. When bhaiya comes back from school, you
can’t contain your joy and scream and shout until bhaiya holds you. You have become mobile and can roll from one
point to another. So much so that now
you have a preference of sleeping on your side, which really worries me, so I
am watching the monitor like a hawk, and keep putting you on your back every
time you turn. You went for your first outing this month to enjoy the beautiful
spring weather, and of course to humor
your mamma with obligatory spring pictures.
We went to the Grapevine Botanical Gardens and the Dallas Arboretum. Both of which you thoroughly enjoyed. You definitely recognize me and Papa, and
always want to be held by us when we are near you, especially your mama, which
makes me so happy.
You will be six months old tomorrow. That is half a year! Can you believe it my big boy? We tried your first vegetable today, the
sweet potato, and you loved it. I am
really hoping this winning streak with vegetables and fruit will continue with
you. You favorite toy is the jumparoo,
you are sitting without support for a few seconds, and more vocal than ever. You will definitely communicate with your goo
goo gagas, and adamantly express yourself.
You love being held by your mamma and your favorite thing to do is
wrestle with your bhaiya and suck on his face.
My Neel, my heart has so much love to give you. I love you so much sweetheart. I love you more than life itself. Our family is so much better since you have
been born. The new relationships you
have built with each of us is so special.
You have touched us in so many ways we thought were not possible. By
making Dhruvi a big brother, you have given him a special little spark. I am so
happy and excited to see this beautiful bond grow between you too.
We have had you for only six months now, just
long enough for me to know that our life is so much better now that you are in
it.
Love you to the moon and back,
Your mamma
